Back Again

Hello all, its being ages I know and firstly let me apologise about that.
But work and all the things of life caught up with me and side tracked me into forgetting about my blog!

Well enough excuses let me tell you what's been happening.
Christmas was spent in California - AMAZING!
Was there over two weeks and saw about as much as I could, we went from the snow capped mountains down to Joshua Tree, a must for any U2 fan.
While there I had the pleasure to go snowboarding, great fun and I look forward to doing it again.

But I have to say the best part of the trip was the company, I and the lady hit it off and had great fun everyday, pretty much laughed everyday.

I have to say the worst part of the trip was coming home, 6 hours of turbulence!!!! And I was stuck in LA time for weeks after.

I forgot to mention that before Christmas the old band and its new member played one last gig! It was brilliant 'High Voltage' all the way. This has spurred us on to keep going, so we are back playing a few gigs and rehearsing, but I have to say the writing of song's is proving a tad more difficult than last time, onwards and upwards!

So after that the new year was just hell on wheels for work! It raced by.
I could not wait till May for it all to slow down again.
The highlight for me was a trip to Austria and Italy in April/May, a beautiful place, absolutely stunning, I was right up in the mountains. I could live there in a heartbeat.

Well now summers here and I feel like I'm at loose end again.
Well my new hobby is Golf, which is great 4 hours away from it all, but I suddenly have the fear it will not be enough.

PS About 2 days in bed would suit me right down to the ground!
I'm sure I'll think of some more things to say that will prick up your ears, but for the mean time bear with me, till I find my rhythm
And on that note I'll leave you with this gem!

PPS A big thank you to all the readers over the last year and a bit for all your advice and comments.

Days & Counting - Winter & I see my late come shining!

Winter is here and with it is the realism of how cold life can be and those around us. Lavish coats and the best fur hats can't keep out this factor!
I only bring this point up as someone very close to me is troubling me. The fact that they can only see me in a bad light and rarely bring any positives to my table, is seriuosly pissing me off! But I have no wish to argue!
This leads me to believe that this in one unhappy person and no matter what I do to please or avoid them something will always be an issue! So what is a good man to do?

Anywho....................whats been going on in my life of late?
Well I've spent a considerable amount of time in the air flying around europe (not fun) and working hard, trying to keep the beast off my back. The one bonus at the moment is that I have booked myself a great holiday - more details to follow!
And work it is, but I must look beyond it and see it as a means to an end! I must believe that there is something. I must act on my thoughts! I must act on my thoughts!

I have been in close contact with FBI Girl and we had the pleasure to catch the young and gifted Texan Micah P Hinson play there last week, we both agreed it was a great gig, but we we're a tad put off by the idiots in the crowd. Alas I got to meet Micah before the show so I was happy and he was a gentleman, and I wish him him all the success in his career!

So in between writing this I am packing again heading East so I best get some good nights rest (like that's ever gonna happen!)

Hope to talk soon!
So lets finish up with something warm for Winter! Again one of my fav's at the moment

Life Coaching, Sad Songs & Thoughts

Lets face it folks, we're past day 100 and my blogging has become sparse and few and far between - I'm Now a lazy SOB!(not slob)

Anyway's I've been working hard and travelling a good bit, thus opening my eyes to the world and all its glories and woes. There are a few things I want to discuss, so let me bullet point them less I forget

- Work and the common man
- Life Coaching
- Sad Songs
- Sad Thoughts
- Holding

Now let me start with the common man. I am quite lucky in my job that entails a vast amount of travel and I end up in many far off places, now the beauty of my job is that it brings me into contact with the common man. I get to see world on a ground level, I honestly believe it's a good thing and when I'm away I try to see this side of the world, this living in a bubble, has to go!

Day 9 (Plus 20) Conforming & Cancer

Ola Bitches! Yeah Im back for another hate filled rant at the system and all it's failures to normality and us!
Rule no. 1 Do Not Wear Polo Necks In Work - We have a dress code (You don't make your own) Honestly where does this crap come from? Who stepped on individuality? That is what I have to contend with on a day to day basis, so I stand alone in a company full of clowns. Now I understand the bigotry that different races when in strange societies.(Im not saying I understand fully their plight, ie the African American in the USA, of North African in France) but society has gone mad, mad mad!
Perhaps it is where I work? They cannot change, so therefore it is I who will have to make the change!


Now admist all the bullcrap that is people crawling the ladder of self gloarification and false happiness! I met a young man (two years older than me) married and a father of two, now I see this guy every so often and he always has a big smile and amazing demeanor when I see him. So I met him yesterday and he had a shaved head an I joked with him about it, asking him was he becoming a monk of some sort?
He joked and said yes, it was not until later in the eve when it was revealed to me that he had been diagnosed with Hodgkins Disease I was so suprised to see that it had not really affected him at all (that is in front of me and others, whose to know what he is thinking)But after my meeting I walked away with a great deal of admiration for this fella.
And its a real I openenr for me, when you read the above bollox I have to deal with!

Makes me think of the days I was reading Lance Armstrongs books, I don't care what people say about him, I think he is a legend!!!

Now Im away for a week, this time heading East, hope to see you in a day or two.

I leave you a great song from a great band Talk Talk - Google them

Day 10 - Monday and I'm dreaming of you

They say distance makes the heart grow fonder................True, but at a cost, Im sad and feeling drery, motivation on this monday is lacking, in all aspects!

I know you are all asking why am I still writing and that I should be done by now, but due to circumstance's beyond my control like apathy and trying to avoid my laptop at home! I spend far to much time in front of the darn things my eyes have gone bog eyed!


The important thing is that I am happy, happy that things have worked out with certain lady, but I am holding this reletionship with kid gloves, I do not need to drop the ball! But like all things in life when you are satisfied with one thing in life, something else begins to nag! I'm sure you are all familiar with this pattern.


Wants and needs! Wants and needs to words that sum up human excistence! I want more money = I need to work more and I want to not have to work more, Catch 22! Is it bad that all I am thinking about right now is my bed? A night under the sheets........oh lord please let me sleep!

Now the last subject of my rant is today is Chillies......and the cooking of a good Chilli, Im looking to do a chilli night soon, and am looking for the best receipe of a chilli (No doubt you'll be commenting first Rob - Look forward to it)
My new thing is the best nights out are nights in with good friends!!!!!

So I leave you with thoughts of me thinking of her!!!!

Day 11 - Writing by candlelight on my achievements

11 Days....a lot can happen in 11 days, a lot can happen in an day, an hour or even a minute! But for now we will only deal with days. The picture I think in some ways is a symbol of my writing's and the time I spent doing this....a little bit of me feels I have aged while writing this (I know I have aged but I think you know what I mean)

A very good friend has asked me what have a learnt in over 90 days of thoughts, emotions and actions, have I become a better person, have I changed????
So now I must take a closer look at those changes and hopefully reveal a little more about my blogging adventure!

The answer, to the above questions is YES! though at a price of really putting myself through the emotional mill! I felt like a dark version of me, a darker sense in my thoughts and writings. Believe me I am not like this in person (unless you get to know me bt that person has to leave me by day 0!

My mind became a negative force in my life, blocking the sun and the positives from life and keeping me in the shade, thus in turn causing me to slip into a depression, I found hard to walk out of! Now if anyone knows of depression and it's many forms then they know of the trap that it is. Now Im not going to say I was in a serious hole,cos that would be lying! I had great friends to spport me and I was never given to long a chance to dwell on on my downs, as everyday I was running around like a loony! (Which was a good thing). One of the major things I learned where that drink and drugs did not suit! Nothing more than these two products, the latter being a dabble once in a blue moon, these two products lifted me off the ground for a brief spell and dropped me down, down, down into what was a well of despair for a few days! so now it is the drink in small dose's I deal in.

Well there is a saying (it's a tad cheesy)but it goes like this.
When your down at the very bottom there is only one way to go, Up!!

To wrap up, I would like you to watch this vid, I kinda know where he's coming from.
Though he has more money!

Day 12 - World Credit Crunch!

I really don't understand all the going's on at the moment, but it's got me nervous, very nervous! Whats going on with the world, why can't we help each other out! I wanna make moves in my career, but this credit crunch has dampened my mood. I am dreaming back to the day when I was so much younger and all that mattered was the weather! Rain we stayed in and Sun was out and about! am I getting that old that all this worries me? House kids and wife..........are these things I want? Answer, Yes!

I want to build a life, a family, a home! But at 30 is it to late? Am I letting all this talk of world economic collaspe stop those dreams? How am I to stand and fight my corner when they are 7 billion in that corner? What and who do I turn to in this time of confusion? Im afraid music may not be the answer, hiding under your bed and living on oranges may be an option! It's like David Sedaris said in his book 'Naked'
Sleep is the best thing when your broke, you forget about your hunger and your misery! - Oh Fuck!

Now I know i've been inconsistent with the blog, but come on I did well enough! So what I have decided to do is stick with the days and finish off with 12 last entry's if possible. Musically my life has been turned into Kings of Leon heaven with the new album - that keeps the depression of the current world at bay for just over 40 mins, thanks boys.

Here is to running free in our minds and to remain forever young!

Day 13 - Beat & Unlucky?

I'm shattered.......all worked out! From office to outdoors the day has ended thank christ, Im on my back in my bed, dreading tomorrow! Where is the relief?
I have rang and rang to no avail. I need a day in bed, no joke! Phone off, curtains closed and a stack of comics and no brainer DVD's (anyone care to join me?)

The tempo in work has increased ten fold as people are leaving or have been sacked so the adventures & meetings keep piling up! What the fuck is it with bosses and meetings? Is it an importance thing? Who the fuck knows......idiots the lot of them!
So as you can guess i have a million meetings tomorrow, see thats the 13!

Im off to bed - Guess Im running outta things to say!
Well here is some cracking music for you all to end todays blog
Check out the Foals

Day 18, 17,16,15 & 14 - Fashion & Reality!!!!!!

Jesus the pressure! I have not forgotten about you all just been away from the computer for a few days, as I attended the opening of Fashion week in a certain city! Wow Wow Wow, Kinda funny when you look at your first real fashion show, I mean I've seen them on the tv and all but up close!
Those girls are skinny let me tell ya, and can walk walk walk! But seriously I had a blast. Always good to get away from what you are doing and emerse yourself in something different!

So the time has flown by on my blog I can't believe it, can you? Everyday I write seems like another piece of the puzzle fitting into place, but if it were that simple then life would be to easy, along with the news a few weeks back of me getting with a lovely lady, has brought about new challenges and raised many new and interesting questions! Now we all known that at the end of the day we have to make our own choices and these aren't easy, and cause undue stress upon one's self! And from that we seek advice anywhere we can, from all sources...........don't tell me you've never looked on the internet for advice and some stories of your problems in the hope that there may be answers there! We are all the same....and we all go through the motions of life...Happy, Sad, Love, death, wealth and being broke!

I can tell you this that you may not find answers in my blog but some observations of my life from my up's and down's and believe me there have been many many downs! Yet of late my mood has lifted and I have myself trawling through Youtube for old videos of songs that I remember from happier days! now I'm not to sure I should post them up so I will lay some links for you all here is 1 and 2

Well Thats all for now, I will try to keep the day to day stuff going!

Day 19 - Disappointment with Humanity

Here on this small fickle planet we all run around, trying to get the most out of our years on the earth, passing each other for the safety of what we believe to be a comfortable life. The picture here does justice to those beliefs, we may rise and be happy but all around others plot our downfall. Paranoid you might say, perhaps, but I have seen the people with the knives. I have seen them stab a man to death and I stood by and watched it all like most of us on this planet! The billions that sit on the fence!

This is something that has become more paramount in the cinema these days with the rise of the superhero, a man/woman who rises against the dark criminal element tormenting the normal lives of people, where ever they may be. Yet we all enjoy these movies but fail to take the message home. Now I'm not saying I may done a cloak and stop bank robbers, no what I trying to say is lets be a bit more positive and helpful to our fellow man/woman. I think the way to this is to listen, and give positive feedback, even throw a hug out every now and then, they work!


I will leave you again with another Rolling Stones video,
Forgive me but I am loving them at the moment!

Day 20 - In harms way

On my late run tonight, brought on by the fear of the earlier McDonalds, I noticed all the slugs and snails sitting pretty on the path with all that possible death looming! So why do they move toward the centre of the path? Do they want to die? Well I throw that out there to the www so lets hope we can get some answers.

Also a thing thats been getting me down, is that I am experiencing a serious lack of music, and that hurts! I found an old album on cassette, the Rolling Stones, Vodoo lounge, jesus I had to scramble around to find a tape player! But after I found one the memories came flooding back! I really think that this is a sexy fucking song! Play it when your with your partner. and seriously mix it up!!



So anyway work is bearing down like a communist hammer! Where has the fun gone from the work environment? The laughs have given way to nervous glances over our shoulders! Where once open chat was at play, suspicious chats take place outside the building so you can see the enemy coming at you! Is this a place where you want to work? Hell no!

Jesus Look what I found! Angelina with a shaved noggin! Now thats hot!


Well to finish the tunnels are being dug!

Day 21 - Skype me Beyatch!

Well what can I say? Last night a DJ saved from a broken heart! Well not quite that, but I have to say a big thanks to Skype, gives me the opportunity to converse with peeps around the world (if you know what i mean)

Well the pressure for moving to greener pastures is mounting! All thanks to Mr. D, you know who you are have no fear the ball and wheels are in motion!

Good night

Day 25, 24, 23,& 22 - Sitting in the back of my mind

It's been a long few days, days of bad news, meeting old friends, drinking, laughs topped off by very little sleep! Which in turn has left me tired and cranky and some what a little down.
I was shocked on day 25 when I received an email from my Boss annoucing his leaving of the company I work for, I was really dissapointed by this fact, as he was a good guy, someone I could speak freely with and more importantly trust! Now that he has left the company I feel a bit isolated in a sea of coruption and back stabbing! His words to me of not trusting anyone and they don't respect you has left me cold!

Now the seeds have been sown, I have to get outta here! Go somewhere where I am appreceiated for who I am, yes that's right the happy go lucky fella,the Prince of Eternia! (He-Man).


I suddenly feel the world is closing in, the skies constantly grey, as the humour has dissapered with the sun. The days are rolling into one, and my shoulders heavy with thoughts of my life and the path I walk and drive! There has always been something holding me back in my mind, a small nagging worry! I need to be rid of it.
The only way to describe what I am talking about is looking to your friends to catch you as you fall back, To actually go through that would be brilliant!

Also at the moment all my music has turned sour! I need something new, something uplifitng! I have been listening to this album again after their suprise Mercury win!



Well I shan't leave it so long next time for all you readers.
Though what I will be turning to is how to keep a long distance reletionship sparkle?
Answers on a comment!

Day 26 - I am in Love with the most beautiful girl in the world!

I am in Love with the most beautiful Woman in the world! I needed to say that. It took a long time coming, but I must shout it out. Thank you God for brining her into my world.

You have made me better.


For you all please listen to Bob Dylan's Blood on the Tracks to know what I am talking about!

Day 27 - Early Flight & Late to bed!

Yup thats me on the ballon cathing my early flight! Sorry for the delay on the post, completely bombed last night was up packing etc etc. So I am away for the weekend with work not bad as it keeps me outta trouble and I get to catch up with fellow colleagues from around world!

So I arrived in the city and had an afternoon pint! I'm destroyed now!

I wanted to say a 1000 things to you all, but my phone has just buzzed and I have recieved some startling news! So I'll have to get back to you with my thoughts!


Before I go FBI Girl has brought this lot to my attention White Lies Check out 'Death'

Day 28 - Early to bed & a lighter Soul

Just like the title, thats me! Im off to bed. I want to feel comfortable and am finding that hard at the moment, so bed it is.
I have just nailed a vindaloo so will really look forward to that tomorrow!

My anxiety is really playing up at the moment, all my current tasks have become boring chores as my mind wanders across the space time continum to who knows where!
I try hard to ground myself but the emotions in my body will not allow it. 'Stay here Nomar! Stay with us here, high in the clouds'
Need to relax need to get rid of the energy!, Back to gym for me! Been away to long!

Well on the good news side FBI girl and I will be hitting the concerts soon and will no doubt be drafting up little reports on the gigs, we are currently lining up my current favourite Micah P. Hinson! That pic was taken by me at a festival just passed, Tickets have been confirmed!We also have Bon Iver and the Kings of Leon also so plenty of fun to come!

I have one thing to add to today's blog my Soul is lighter and I am getting happier day by day. A women is in my head I have looked at her face, for a long time, so that I have burned it onto my retina, her smile, the way her head turns away when she laughs, keep me moving somehow. At times in my head her face is inches from mine and I long to kiss her, kiss her forever! This is for her.

In Memoriam:27
I hold it true, whate'er befall;
I feel it, when I sorrow most;
'Tis better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all
Alfred Lord Tennyson

Day 29 - Star Trek Worms & Indiana Jones Metaphors

Apologies about the gross picture. But of late I'm nervous and stresed as fuck. So the picture reperesents the aliens inside me eating me away from the inside. Right now I feel like i'm walking on broken glass or thin ice. I'm afraid to speak to freely as to what is going on at the moment, it's as if one word of it will break the spell and I will fall again. And to fall this time would be to much for me, that I know!
So all I ask is that you be patiant with me over the coming few days.

I had a brief talk with 'Anon' (Thanks) and he put life in this metaphor.
Think of the movie Indiana Jones and the temple of Doom, and the scene in the rail carts! Well thats life - moving in one direction, we can somehow change direction of the flow by either leaning to the side, using the brake or turning off when available, but in the end we are moving in one direction only!

So its been a few days since I added music.
Well as I am having serious paranoia and anxiety attacks I turned to an unlikely source of music to relax me, The Foo Fighters, now I'm a big fan no doubt about it. So please enjoy this song 'Home'
from their last album.

Good Night and don't let the stress worms bite!

Day 33, 32, 31 & 30 - Lights in Tunnels?

I know I know, it's been about 4 days!, buts it's been a roller coaster of a week and I mean roller coaster. My emotions are all over the place. Some things in my life have become a little bit clearer and some not so much.
Not sure if some of you have guessed, but I believe my life may be turning for the better, hence the light in tunnel picture. But to get better I have to make a few choices. Such as moving away from my homeland, leaving my Job, and giving up a few more bits and bobs!

I think it will be worth it, it has to be. I have to believe in things and that they will change for the better. If you have followed my blog you will have seen I have completed a downward spiral, so much so that I headed towards doctor to seek medical advice............but something has happened that has led to a slight turnaround of fortunes, Yet I have to keep my cards close to my Chest, sorry.

As always its late and I have to sleep. I will write a more in depth blog tomorrow filling in the 4 days.

Day 34 - Thoughts about it all

Thats me! Right there thinking about it all, and Im scared really fucking scared. The way I feel right now I'd be happy in front of a firing line, Shoot you Bastards what ya waiting for!

Right now there are many things going on in my life, that I'm afraid to write down, the problem is that, that is not the purpose of this blog. But I want to keep everything in right now. Im afraid to say things in case they aren't real, like I might wake up.

So I ask you all to bear with my nerves.

Day 35 - Easy does it fella!

I have to breath, take a deep breath of air and relax. The mind is racing, but like I say small steps really small.
Its 4 in the morn and I have to sleep, I will edit this post tomorrow so as to let you know whats going on!

Day 38, 37 & 36 - Addition

I completly forgot to mention the act of the festival, Grace Jones! Mad Mad Mad, what a preformer! She oozed confidence, style and mostly sex appeal on the stage! I honestly stood there with my mouth open for her whole set! She is now in my eyes a stage genius! I would gladly pull up to her bumper anyday!

Day 38, 37 & 36 - Peace

What a festival, really good, I was happy that I stuck to my guns and checked out a lot of bands and got to see the acts I wanted to see, one been Micah P.Hinson and he was class.

The picture to the left is kinda the get up I was wearing all week at the festival, one likes to get down with all cultures when at the festivals! so many things where there and so many things to see. What I never understand is how people just let all the music pass them by and concentrate on the booze and other things (if you know what I mean)
I get a lot of questions asking for a profile image, now I know I put one up, but for all you fans, who have stayed the course with me over the last 3 months I post this picture for you!

When I look at these men and women performing and think of how much I'd love to do it, jelousy runs riot in my mind. But then I stop and relax and say my time will come. I think in away that seeing so much music can only spur me onto try and I emphasis TRY! to write more music and write good stuff. Time to pick up the guitar.

To all readers, I feel a lot better today then I have in a while.
But remember these are emotions and they are forever wild like the ocean, so I am aware and I will always watch the sky.

Day 39 - Nerves

Off to the festival tomorrow and I'm as nervous as fuck!
I don't know whats wrong with me, stomach is in knots, I think it's the fear of will I have a good time? or a bad time? would I be better off staying in bed all weekend? Have I gotten to the stage where I will be afraid to leave the house.

Well anywho I am going down and have about a million and one things to do in the morning, I should be sleeping but alas I can't (nerves).
So I will be outta action for the next 3 days unless I can blog from there? Actually I think I can and will give it a go if I can.

So till next time, wish me luck!

Day 40 - Fighting my Demons

My inner demons have been battling for a long time now, and I feel Im falling between the cracks of their war! I am torn between the two, to walk the road of control and the right choice, or living one by where guilt is non - exsistent and my actions are not viewed upon as bad, now it's not like I'm gonna kill anyone!

But I am terrible for beating myself up if I really let myself go!
But we all have to vent and let our hair down some time? Right?

I am sure one day my thoughts will be clear and I can rest easy, this brings me to the thoughts of moving away again, finding something new to push me forward.
I am a dreamer, always have been. But it's a good thing great for the imagination.
My imagination is what awakens the demons, so most of the time I am in a vicious circle! How do you get out?


So I am away to sleep. I will be heading off to another festival this weekend so i'll be outta action for a few days, but tomorrow I will be doing a festival music special! (Depends if I'm not wrecked that is, as I will be working late again)

Day 41 - Run all you like....

'It's to bad she won't live, but then again who does' Possibly the greatest line in a movie ever!
When I was younger and back in my Uni days I remember I watched this film practically every day, the whole story of a man on his own dealing with his own emotions and struggling to survive and understand the world around him, as he becomes more and more disappointed with it! I always wanted to be him, walk around and be the silent type.

Was all a dream as my mind played games and I ran amoke and joke and laughed around while the others passed me by! Now I have the fear that when Im forty that all these thoughts will resurge and possibly destroy me!

I have so many thoughts running through my head at the moment, thoughts about every choice I make, its like for everthing there is right way and a wrong way.
And all I want to do is let go sometimes, jump away from it all, throw myself into another life, become someone totally different!
Might have a look at those options tomorrow.

Today whilst at work while my mind battled the will to live and the will to work, I rediscoverd a great musician who I had only heard snippets of, but now I'm back to being a big fan. Might I add it was all thanks to Last Fm.
I hope you like this fella Josh Rouse.

I bid you all goodnight and hope you have a better day tomorrow!

Day 42 - It gets Rough!

The say a picture paints a thousand words, should I stop now? Relax readers. This picture is a symbol of my life in work! Absoulute cobblers! Bloody Monday morning and I am getting warning's to watch my back, what kind of way is that to motivate someone! Sweet God and baby Jesus, you'd swear I was working in anicent Rome!

So much for trying to be a nice guy, honestly you just wanna keep your head down and just carry on and there is always someone making waves! And now I gotta surf them.
I honestly now know that my mental health is diterating at an enormous rate and this work thing is like petrol on the fire!

Hell is other people! Have a read please.

Well I've had enough of the world today, so I'll turn to the most fucked up place on the world for entertainment, Hollywood!!!!!!

Bon Nuit! And if you see me out on the street don't wave hello, just shoot me, and finally some music, these guys
the Redwalls are playing some European dates and might be worth a look.
Now to wrap up with some great stuff Doves, oh yes something right in the world!

Day 44 & 43 - Old Man and Festival Fun

It was but an hour ago, the weekend had come to a close, ended in a dark movie theatre watching Hellboy 2, I was a bit wrecked so did not truly enjoy the movie, none the less it's good. Anywho as I was driving home and I had to get petrol, as I was pulling out of the garage, an old man with a cane passed in front of me. I recognised him as the old janitor from my primary school, he had aged so much, all I remember of him was his blue jump suit and his brisk walk with his keys. He sat on a wall and looked at me, eye to eye like he knew, I knew who he was, I smiled and gave him a nod and he to nodded back. Just makes me think of the Neil Young song 'Old Man'
The question in my head was, did he have a good life? Was he happy with his lot? How will I be when I'm his age? Will I have someone to love me the whole day through?

Over the last two days I attended a festival that was right on my doorstep, good fun was had over the two days, but Jesus it was freezing yesterday, so thank God the sun came out today, so we could dance away to some mad Ukraine music, and I mean dance. The beer from Saturday night had sapped most of my energy, but was good to be out and about, thinking of other things.

It's funny how we try to get the most out of weekends, make em last and make em count!

I leave you tonight with a little taste of DakhaBrakha check it out!

Day 45 - Lost for words

This has been me in the last two weeks and now it's all catching up with me and fast, I am currently dead on my feet, all for the love of the game. Yet been tired is seriuosly damaging my writing skills. I will be honest that in the last two entries I had, had a few drinks but it was also very late and I was again shattered!Thus not very good blog entries.

So what I'm trying to say is that I have a slight case of burnout from the job which in turn is leading to me having some form of writers block!
And NO readers going out and getting laid will not cure me! What I need is Inspiration!
All I have to do is seek it out. hmmmmm, where?

Well thank Christ that week is over, yet I have a reprieve of two days off to gather my thoughts and rest up and nail the following week! Christ I sound far to positive!
All I wanted to do was hit the bars and nail a McDonalds but I prevailed, I avoided the 'you worked hard' treat yourself mentallity, I would throw all my hard running work out the window!

Coming back to my need of inspiration perhaps I could track down a muse? If you know of any let me know.


Tomorrow morning I set of early to go shooting! Don't ask! Perhaps it will help me relieve some of the stress from work, but I'm not gonna lie to you, I'm looking forward to it!

Here's to shooting and better writing!
Back to the music, I don't believe I have mentioned one of Europe's greatest bands
Have a listen and I mean listen!

On a final note, perhaps the reason why I have been coming up short on the blogs is my reason not to talk of reletionships and that sort of thing. If Im good at it, why not stick with it!

Love you all

Day 46 - New Friends and goodbyes

My job is a funny one, why? Because we get to spend the week with someone and then say goodbye never knowing when you will see them them again. Which I think kinda sucks!
The thing is that I may meet someone who is cool and on my wavelength and we have the banter, yet after a period we must say goodbye. Which in a way kinda leaves me feeling a bit **it!

It's like those summer holidays you had when you were a kid, friendship that would never die, talking with that friend for hours, yet when summer ends...............
It's not easy, and it's not something we should be doing all the time as I believe it causes some distres for both parties. Well I won't lie, I made some good friends this week and hope I can stay in touch.

Must be getting sentemental in my old age!

Day 47 - Mazes...........

With a few beers in me I dread the writing of tonights blog, Drink brings out the worst in me, as it's a derpressant! Well it covers the ground for short period, but like all thing's it can't last!

I watched a young kid (name escapes me) dance like a looney, free as can be.
Half the time all I want to do is have a bop!

Well anyway what we got here, is a beautiful pic for all to see.
Quickly on tonights point, we are all maze's, there is far to much to understand in other dialouge.


Addition:
Jasus I must have been a bit tipsy last night what shite was I talking?
Anywho My point of maze's still stands.

Day 48 - Dinner for one!

Now Now, don't feel sad for me, I'm ok! Just been one of those days, worked hard and tried to be the good honest worker for the day, i.e put in a few extra hours(God bless me). So this left me missing dinner, and when I got back to the Cell (hotel room, the novelty wears off quick)I had to get out, dress down and meet the locals!
Well you'll never guess what I did! I cruised the mean streets of this fair old town and looked for some form of entertainment, and in the form of that only a critic would love!

Cinema - Alone - Walked past all the young un's "One for *******2" "Sorry movie is not out till tomrrow" Cut to me walking past all the kids, like an idiot!

Dinner - Alone - Restaurant was quiet very quiet, two couples were in there eating, I enter, music stops and couples look up (only joking) but the couples did look up, "Table for one, please?" "One?" "Yes one please" and here was me thinking could you keep me standing any longer????!

Well the dinner was nice even had a nice glass of wine, after the odd looks and slight embarrasment of reading the Mind Health times all through my dinner it was time to finish the evening. I could not face going back to the hotel, although the shower was enough to have me running back (I've gone through litres of shower gel). What will I do? What is there to do in this town?

Sweet God and Baby Jesus - Let's Roll!
They have a bowling alley, hallelujah! Off I went, now it was not the greatest alley in the world, But I gave it my all, I was rusty very Rusty! (Karl thats for you) High scored 147, dissapointing. I can do better. But none the less it was good to get out and have a throw! Ended up getting 4 games for the price of 3 (Happy days).

Now for all you doubters the Sun does shine on me!.
The only problem about been on your tod for to long is how much you rely on your mobile, to keep you busy, you find yourself saying please ring or even a txt. What Sad crap it all is.

Bed now, big run tomorrow morning................You have to be fit to Bowl!

Now for a little bit of music, my good friend is going to take me to see these fellas
Balkan Beat Box.....................I'm Game!

Day 49 - A pang of thought can wipe away a smile

You know those moment's you have when all is plain sailing and suddenly you remember some bad time of your life, it's like a flash! and then its gone, but that second can feel a lot longer, a small drop of doubt in your ocean of life. How does this happen.
Today for example, I'm working my socks off and just getting on it, but for a split second when I happen to be alone, it happens, the seed of doubt. Now it did not last long as work called and all thoughts were brushed aside. Yet here I am 4 hours later writing about it! I know you know what I mean.

Work is good, good for the soul, good for the madness of life, something to keep you moving along, yet find something that fufills, I'm looking ok! The band thing might happen, but when working in tight creative units things can get a bit hairy, much like a reletionship! (That's for you Rob)

When when those pangs hit I want you to think of this song (not necessarly all about women here)

I have drawn the curtains in the hotel room, I am looking forward to bed, sleep where everything is miles and miles away, today is tomorrow for me as it will be a repeating work day, though I will look forward to a beer or two.

Now I'm thinking of taking a small holiday, week or two, comment's recommending places will be appreciated!

Time to recharge. So Wind me up!
Night World (If only you were reading)

Day 50 - Half way there and further away!

The action of walking backwards, something I think I perfected! Fear not readers moving forwards is priority. It's been a strange day I have had not much time to think of things and have been working all day just finished another 14 hour day. But a day with a plan is a good day progression movement, all key. It's hard though as these days are taxing and can cause me a relapse into the unknown.


It's half past midnight and I've just finished for the day, have not eaten so the good people at the hotel have juiced me up with Coco Pops, I don''t know what it is but it brings out the kid in me, perhaps we should all eat more coco pops!

Im gonna hit the hay and dream of making it big in the band, what a life!
These guys are dreaming and making it happen, Twisted Wheel!

As always leave your comments here!

Day 51 - Super powers & on the Road again

A quiet night in brought about the conversation with a friend of if you had a super power what would it be? Mine would be super speed (Like the Flash!) & Time travel! So I could get round to all the things I need to do! and go back in time and correct my wrongs!(Though in matter of fact if I did that I'd never learn anything) Well if you look at all these super hero's etc they are flawed and all have some problems, we are human after all. So could the greatest super power be humility, something we could all do with a little more of. Though just in case you are wondering I would use my powers for good! (Temptation would exist though)


Well as I declared in today's title I'm on the road again, I wrote briefly about my stint in Bulgaria, well from tomorrow I will be heading to the country for the week, F**K my luck, so it's work and stress for a full week, I had no downtime which I feel I desperatly need, somewhere where technology is forbidden and my phone is dead to the world, and guilt was left a million miles away! Need to get the Feng shui back into action again.
Finding it hard to get the full needed rest when I'm away and that in turn leads to me getting many grey hairs, as always I'll keep you posted on my weeks work.

Last thing today, you know when you hear a song and you have felt that way and completley understand what the song is about, and you say, Why the hell did I not write about that! Don't you hate that! I'm getting that quite a bit.
I know I have not written about music of late, it's not so easy when your away as the laptop is to slow for me to thrawl through the music world.
Here are a few ones I have been listening to, kinda chilled and I'm trying to relax my mood.

Gregory and the Hawk..................Name is a curveball, but nice voice.

Beth Orton................I love her, she is Hot!!!!!!

My Bright Diamond..............Close the curtains and light candles and lay with your lover music!