Day 94 - Introduction

It just dawned on me this evening that I forgot to mention what the title of my blog means and stands for. apologies all. Well firstly I shall explain what Ronin means, well I'll get it from wikipedia
Ronin - A ronin (浪人, rōnin?) was a samurai with no lord or master during the feudal period (1185–1868) of Japan. A samurai became masterless from the ruin or fall of his master (as in the case of death in a war), or after the loss of his master's favor or privilege. Please follow this link for more info.

I can only image where my interest began with these types of people, for you see the Samurai lived by a strict code the Hagakure (A guide for the warrior) and their master, so when a Samurai looses their master they became Ronin, and really should have committed suicide, than rather face a life with out direction or master.

And this is were my interest stems, I believe that many people me included are meandering through life, no direction, we have all but given up on religion where im from, Money and materilism are the new Gods, with the new big shopping centres the churchs, filled on Sundays might I add!

I know I lack direction and strive to find it I honestly do, but its a long road with many distractions, Sirens calling the sailors to shore, I must ignore, and live the life I have dreamed of!

I hope that has explained a little bit more of what Im saying in this blog, apologies to all as my computer will not allow me to upload pictures today, they paint a thousand words.
Well I want you to picture a rickety rope bridge spanning a vast Chasm (Think Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom) that bridge is what it feels like to be walking my life now! One slip and Im gone, gone and gone. Trying to stay on top of things

Now its late and Im nodding off, but I'll do an addition in the morrow.

Not forgetting the music check out these nutballs
Tubowolf.....................................People say Im an old man, but don't mind me check these out!
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=27784108

Day 95 (Two days in one)

Im rolling Saturday & Sunday into this one, Saturday was ok settling the nerves of a hangover by addressing the problem with more drink! not the answer and one that left me with more problems! F***

I recall an old episode of saved by the bell where Screech constantly repeats
'I must think before I act, I must think before I act'

Everything we do causes ripples, something happens! I sometimes feel that I have no control over my actions, am I some machine paving a path of emotional destruction across the battlefield that is my life? I often hear myself saving the last thing I want to do is cause 'Pain'! Am I some sick and twisted Masochist? I tell you I am not, and never shall be. I must think of my actions clearly, but then that would stop spontanaity, which I love! though with age I feel Im slowing down on that front.

So what is coming to a head in my thoughts is the process of 4o days and 40 nights avoid women all together, do the ostrich and bury my head in the sand, to love another one must love one self,

and I'm far off that, been taking to many hits that haved cut me down and left me sitting in a ground zero of myself. Though when one is down so low there is only one way to go.....up!

Which that much on my mind at present I felt it was time to step off the battlefield of reality, and seek solace in music, and what better way to do it than spend the evening with the God father of Grunge, Neil Young! Wow tell you what, the fella really goes heavy on the guitar, his ten min solo's where something to behold, I hope I have that energy when Im that old. It was great to see someone who clearly a living ledgend. I have a small list of music artists I want to see, and I've been slowly chipping away at it, though I can't seem to remember who is on it! Was a great gig and he finished with the Beatles - A day in the Life - you can imagine the energy he put across! Thanks Neil, I'll sleep happy (I hope)


Through all this fear and haze of life's questions I hold out for New York City, let me get buried in the madness of it, and forget my troubles!

3 days and counting........don't fret all I shall be keeping the blog going over in NYC.

Coming back to my opening paragraph I have just found a article on the BBC website

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/7475695.stm what do we look for in each other! The world is selling the wrong ideas to us all, sex sells but its a bad product with no refund!

Also this song from the Arctic Monkeys is playing in the background 'Leave before the lights come on' the singer Alex Turner's words can sting you with a guilt trip......

Now please don't get me wrong I've done no wrong, but my head is spinning right now, I have a further 94 days to get it right, Big Brother you reading?

Todays musical tastes comes from Texas and Ol Blighty, and my my the singer from Texas has some voice! I've also included the Last of the Shadow puppets, I know they've been knocking around these past few months but I have to say I do enjoy them old old school, check out the styles!


Shearwater..........................................Sail away with these delights
http://profile.myspace.com/shearwater

The Last of the Shadow Puppets.....Style and music to boot! http://youtube.com/watch?v=_8YRx47oylM&feature=user

Day 96 addition

Been doing a bit of music browsing and had had to throw these mad rock boys in (all the way from Japan, they get points for Name alone

Charlie Brown & Baseball team.............................Japanese Fun n Frolics!
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=1000540095

Also these boys from Domino Records
Wild Beasts............................................................Hmmmm slow burner!
http://www.myspace.com/wildbeasts

Ps don't worry about the Japanese lyrics :)

Day 96

A picture paints a thousand words, and if that was the case I'd finish up here, and move on to Day 95, alas that is not in the script, I can hear your sighs of relief. As you can gather I had a big one last night, the talk of taking it easy was soon washed down with a swift JagerBomb! Ker Splash Boom! Now all said twas a fun night, its important to do the drunk thing once in a while, keeps you in the ship with all your mates, no peer presure was involved! And keeps you in the loop somewhat.

Now the thing about Hangovers for me is the amount of time you spend thinking, you literally work from your first steps to now, ponder over the mistakes and missed oppurtunities, and then plan a colditz type of escape, to rid yourself of these thoughts!

I made a quick getaway to the cinema, only to be dissapointed at the elongated music video that was shown, should have gone to the bar again and washed all sins and thoughts away! (Money well Spent)

I recall last night getting in and wanting to rant and rave on this blog but am now relieved I didn't, God knows what I would have said! Outted all the evil doers in my life!

So on the feelings front I think everything is ok, I am trying to keep myself busy and adjusting to the mind battle that is me and the world, but I am happy to find solace in music. I just love the way that music can say everything about your mood, so i've been going for a mixed bag of stuff of late, buts thats great with me! Coming up with all sorts of stuff.

The good thing about it all is listening to the lyrics, there is some great stuff out there, now Im not gonna start quoting it all but its always the lines that create a pang and note of I know where he/she is coming from........One that has gotten me, was from the Arctic Monkeys - Leave before the lights came on - "How can you wake up with someone you don't love and not feel slightly phased by it" this line could possibly sum up every Saturday and Sunday morning! (Sweeping Statement, ah what the hell and by the way I did not mean me!)

There are many more but i'll try to throw a few around.

Now lets stop and have a moment to relax please follow link sit back and enjoy

I hope you all enjoyed that.

Im gonna sign off now, I may be back later, but please check out this young man he's good

David Kitt..............................................Intelligent and Good! Say no more and It's Yours

http://profile.myspace.com/davidkitt

Day 97

For some reason I started thinking of the phrase "happiness is a warm gun" (Picture attached) so what Im thinking is what does it mean? Is it a comment on power? No one will f*** with you when you have a gun, except other people with guns? Perhaps?

So I went to the online info site Wikipedia, and that told me nothing of this song, just the madness of Acid Trips and music mixed. Though there is something about that saying 'Happiness is a warm gun' (I am not a nut!) All I ask is that you think about it.

So last night, great round of golf, sort of - it's a release, phones and hassels put aside so you can deal with the mental anguish that is 18 holes of Golf!

So tell me this what should one do when one needs company? and can't deal with being on their own? Some of you might say try your friends sit and laugh etc etc, but is it me that wants more than that, friends you see know you, your pro's and con's, whilst in new company it's new ideas talk, emotions lets just say new everything. But what happens when that can turn to more? when all you wanted is company?
Can you all eloborate?

Weekend is here sweet Jesus thanks! Been a mixed week thats the truth, emotions were low at the beginning but I feel some veil has lifted in the past few days, will it stay? And it been Friday what will one do with ones self? Drink myself to a stuper? No No No the demon drink shall not take my soul, the Demon drink shall not take my soul! Shall never ever for ever ever! So I think im gonna take it easy as I have to keep the green for the Manhattan scene!

Ok gonna sign off now but here's the moment you've all been waiting for! What have I been listening to today

Ok here is something straight from my heart:

Rusty Springfield.......................Old School, New Rule! http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=51731720

James Yuill..................................New Receipe for old dish and tastes fantastic (Thanks FBI Girl) http://www.myspace.com/jamesyuill

Day 98

How do we (Men and Women) always misread each other and are constantly volatile? .

Like Chris Rock said

"Reletionships, easy to get into, hard to maintian!"

Work was unsatisfying as ever! But there were a few laughs, i shan't go into to much detail as this might give away who I am! (Like you care)

I recall in my youth how I wanted to be creative and run free, but most of all be creative!

I now think thats what I should be doing........Mr. Cricket I sense my calling! We'll have to sit down and talk more about it.

I mean if you look at it from outside you need to be challenged everyday and not just the brain, everything.........feet, eyes etc etc! And with what I know now that my job does not feel that criteria - oh the exotic locations and sandy beaches, but am I happy? NO!

So rise up (in your minds, lets face it you'd be happy just plodding along) I may be the same! But I need to start thinking outside the box (Big Time)

Now I know I've promised talk of New York, but at present it has not entered my mind (busy) but I think i'll be spending the 4th of July on a beach most likely getting wasted ! Yes I need a release, so i'll be hiding all the old records, pumping up the dance and sassy R&B and enjoying myself who knows maybe more than just me! Be warned ladies of New York!

So again Im been rushed to write my blog as work (Golf) is interupting, so Im thinking of changing the time of writing, perhaps late in the evening? I'd feel like Dougie Howser(I never liked him)

As you can probably tell Im in better mood, not sure why, but I hope I stay this way for a bit

So as you can tell of the symbolism here in this image.

Gonna wrap up here with some music thanks to FBI Girl for her help as always

Cystal Castles...........................Oh worth a listen and fun to boot!

http://www.myspace.com/crystalcastles

Clap your hands say Yeah.....Satan said Dance, nuff said!

http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=8540231

Pete Yorn.................................For the younger days of my mispent youth

and for keeping the music simple, listen to Stronger than "gotta know myself before i know someone else" brilliant line

http://www.myspace.com/peteyorn

Day 99

Well today started badly!


Kinda felt like I had taken two steps back, which would have been Day 101!

I think the day has gotten a bit better, although my F -ing Car is on the way out!


But one must roll with it, there are always solutions and a way out of the bad things.

So I had a brief night off last night working on my Road Rage skills on GTA4 (Not really my bag) but a small release from the crap, but the long run before worked out a bit better.

So I have to introduce some people in my blog life, these people assist in adding some of the content and hopefully will stay the journey till Day 1

Firstly FBI Girl, she is great at keeping me up to date with the madness of the music world.
So everyday i'll be talking to her and discussing music and throwing up some of the new crazy and lovable musical beats the world has to offer.

Well I've just been informed I have to work tonight (Sweet Deal)
So no doubt i'll be in a bad mood again tomorrow! But I'll beat it.
A job is a job is a job, and whose says they bring happiness?

I have a close friend who is keen on selling me the idea of moving to a foreign land to work, but I remain unsure, is the grass always greener? (Your thoughts world) so I think I should start looking into alternative methods of enlightenment, coming from a Christian background, I'm going to throw the door wideopen to all,
again anyone reading this please feel free to send some ideas!

Now I know I said I will speak of my up and coming trip to the United States of America, well I will have to prospone to another day as Im up to my eyes in work and will not have the time to spill the beans on it,but no fear "Tomorrow is another Day"

Ok time for some music...........
Today we have and Im loving these!

Midnight Juggernauts.........................Bowie esk vocals with music that kicks the hips into life! Here is the song of the moment for me (follow link)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J6SKNEYvZvQ&feature=related

White Denim.........................................New Age Jimi, nuff said!
http://www.myspace.com/bopenglish

Now whilst writing this I've noticed my mood has lifted this is through the medium of music
Thanks for reading all
To worry about tomorrow is to be unhappy today”

An attachement to Day 100

I ment to add this

http://youtube.com/watch?v=VEOV5vWfSgI

Please follow this for some goodtimes music!

Thanks

See you all tomo!

Day 100 (Counting Down)

DAY 100

I decided to count down to see if I can find Clarity and understanding, so i've given myself 100 days (October 2nd should be one hell of a day)

Firstly I'll start off with a sonnet, this has been on my mind for quite sometime now.

Now take from it what you will, but it has meaning and can help in my quest

SONNET 18
Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?
Thou art more
lovely and more temperate:
Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May,
And summer's lease hath all too short a date:
Sometime too hot the eye
of heaven shines,
And often is his gold complexion dimm'd;
And every
fair from fair sometime declines,
By chance or nature's changing course
untrimm'd;
But thy eternal summer shall not fade
Nor lose possession of
that fair thou owest;
Nor shall Death brag thou wander'st in his shade,
When in eternal lines to time thou growest:
So long as men can breathe
or eyes can see,
So long lives this and this gives life to thee.

Yes great words I hear you say, and how right you are.

So along with my daily ramblings, I will discuss the following topics

Life

Love

Music

Sport (Cricket, Football, and Baseball

The Band (working title Castration)

Friends

Food

Travel (I do a lot)

Women

Friends

Religion

and

everything else

Now let me begin.............

Today is not a great day, I have begun to think of my x girlfriend again and this is not good, I wander around during the day with a smile while inside all i want to do is ly down and sleep.

That constant thought of what is she doing now? is she happy?

We went out just shy 3 years (Long time)So it feels like I have lost a limb!
Constantly trying to fill the hole is having a bad effect to much eccess! And you only get one life!

So one must turn slowly and face the daylight and carry on..................

Music at the moment is the key here so I've been busy searching for little gems that can sum up all emotions or bury them!

Here is a brief list

Fleet Foxes ........................Brilliant stuff, mellow with some great vocals and as one person described it like listening to great winter weather (Snow that is)

Band of Horses....................Is there a Ghost, amazing and simple, check it out!

Bon Iver..............................Not sure if I should be listening to it but it's brilliant sad and refreshing at the same time, all great albums are written about Break ups! Check out Re: Stacks, I saw them play live recently and honestly its how music should be.

I think I've said enough today, I'll be back tomorrow, with talk of my build up to my holiday to NYC